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Meat Max and Marvin

Perhaps one of the most wonderful and interesting meetings of my journey so far-meet the Berliners Ms. Hannah and Ms. Sofia. A chance encounter on the streets of Da Nang resulted in the elusive hunt for a Vietnamese hipster bar. However, a thirst for alcohol led us to the very incongruous with Da Nang nightlife, chic Luna Pub.

Vodka infused coconut cream, mojitos, and caipirinhas brought forth a wonderful night of tales, both tall and short. It went a little something like this…

Ms. Hannah and Ms. Sofia are both beautiful young free spirited non-traditionalists, pursuing careers in philosophy, journalism and art (the most difficult, yet most rewarding of careers).  Being the paradigm of beauty and youth in Vietnam, Hannah and Sofia have encountered their fair share of run-ins, including unwanted advances on Sofia’s butt while receiving a massage. There seems to be an overabundance of complete body massages in Vietnam. Someone should monitor this. Regardless, out of such rugged experiences, the alter egos Max and Marvin were born.

Max and Marvin are cigarette smoking bad asses, capable of pessimism and optimism simultaneously. They take a flat white and a cigarette for breakfast after a rough night of sex….with four or five women. When not surpassing Freud in philosophical thought, Max and Marvin can be seen battling cockroaches, petting dolphins, and drinking copious amounts of alcohol in Southeast Asia.

However, both Max and Marvin met their most ferocious experience in Hanoi. Max and Marvin began a night sitting in a traditional Vietnamese restaurant. Thanks to an overly infatuated bartender, the two young travelers became quickly intoxicated from complimentary local rice wine.

As we all know, when we drink, we get hungry. Hence Max and Marvin order some food. Local dishes from the region were brought out. Typical of Vietnam, the dish was flavorful yet harbored the usual mystery meat. Is it chicken? It is beef? Is it goat? Just eat. Satiated, Max and Marvin pay a rather expensive bill and return to their hotel in a drunken stupor and sleep.

The following morning, in a haze of unusual nausea, Max and Marvin take their flat white and cigarette, pack their bags and venture through the neighborhood they had debased the night before.

HOLY SHIT! There are dog heads everywhere. AND HOLY FUCK! “We fucking ate dog meat last night.” Vomit and three days of no eating ensues.

Tall TalesShawn MerzComment